The Connoisseur
new varieties of chips!

new varieties of chips!

Blair’s Death Rain - Habanero

Hey guys,

The spiciest chip I ever ate was Dortios Scorchin’ Habanero, which you can read about here: http://onchips.tumblr.com/post/1655167541/doritos-burn-series-scorchin-habanero. I read about those Doritos online, and apparently its heat level pales in comparison to Blair’s Death Rain Habanero, which is apparently the spiciest chip in the world. Why, the very creator himself wrote on the bag, “It has been my passion to create food that… makes you FEEL ALIVE.” What’s that supposed to mean? Maybe it’s somehow connected to the XXX HOT warning…

Let’s talk about texture first, although it’s hard to analyze because, well, buy a bag of this and find out. The description says “Kettle Cooked Potato Chips,” so I was expecting a thick-cut chip with a big crunch. The chip certainly has a big crunch, although it is not quite as hearty as, say, Kettle Brand chips. But that could be attributed to the small size of chip, too small to be a mouthful. That’s not a bad thing though…

The initial flavor of the chip is pretty interesting. I’ve never had habanero peppers before, but I imagine this chip is pretty authentic in its flavor. It’s not too salty, yet not bland either. The habanero flavor dies away rather quickly and in its place comes fire. I’m talking real fire. I’m talking just one or two chips making you sweat. I’m eating some yogurt right now just to survive this review. You see the sacrifices I make for you guys? I even made the mistake of eating multiple chips at once, like 10. The heat doesn’t set on until after a 10-second delay, so all at once my mouth became a raging inferno and I literally had to stick my tongue under the cold bathroom faucet to calm myself. My heart rate must have went up by 40.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 4.0/5. Good crunch, but chips are a tad small.

Taste: 1.0/5 for non-spicy fans. 5.0/5 for spicy fans.

OVERALL: 1.0/5 for non-spicy fans. 5.0/5 for spicy fans.

Chester’s Puffcorn - Butter

Hey guys,

Got something new today: Chester’s Puffcorn Butter. Not really sure what Chester’s is all about… is it supposed to be a different line of Cheetos? It’s not a knock-off like some people think; it’s real Frito-Lay. Anyways, the description for Puffcorn on the bag says “Oven Baked. Unlike popcorn, no hulls or hard kernels.” Hm…

Well, the texture is certianly different from popcorn. The snack (it’s not a chip) is shaped like popcorn but larger, like twice the size. It’s not crunchy like popcorn but isn’t soft like cotton candy either; it’s airy with a thin structure like a wafer. Not quite as crunchy though. It does resemble cotton candy in the way that both snacks sort of disappear in your mouth before you swallow. Fortunately, there are no hulls or hard kernels, so it’s snacking without wasting your floss.

While the texture is different, the taste of these Puffcorns is certainly similar to that of popcorn. It has a salty and savory butter flavor, and… that’s all I can really say. Just imagine popcorn. Short taste review this time because there’s really nothing for me to say.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 3.0/5. Interesting, like cotton candy.

Taste: 3.5/5. Buttery popcorn flavor.

OVERALL: 3.5/5


Kettle Brand (Tias!) - Nacho Cheddar

Hey guys,

I apologize for the monthlong hiatus but I’m back now. Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas, can’t wait for New Year’s! I got some new chips today, it’s Kettle Brand Tias! Nacho Cheddar. Let’s see how it rates:

I’m going to compare this chip to a Dorito, because that’s basically what it is: a triangle-shaped tortilla chip. This “tia” is pretty thin, and consequently does not carry a hearty crunch; instead, it has a pretty stale-tasting crunch. After chewing, the chip does not form a moist mush like other chips because, well, the chip is so thin that there’s not enough substance to form a mush. So basically, it stays pretty dry from entering the mouth up until swallowing.

Kettle Brand chips are usually flavorful, much more so than other brands. This chip, however, lacks flavor. I haven’t tried any other varieities of their Tias! line, but I hope it’s not all like this. The chip tastes predominantly of corn, as though it were completely unflavored. Cheese is hardly noticeable. So instead of getting savory, salty cheese flavor, I get bland corn, neither salty nor sweet.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 2.0/5. Thin and dryl

Taste: 1.5/5. Flavorless.

OVERALL: 1.5/5


Ruffles - Authentic Barbecue

Hey guys,

Back here at Onchips with another Ruffles review. This time I’m testing Ruffles - Authentic Barbecue. I’m pretty sure it used to be called something else; just plain “Barbecue” or something. Whatever, let’s get crunching:

Ruffles are decently crunchy, but only for the first couple bites. Then the chip becomes sort of soft and soggy. Thanks to the ridges in the chip, the chip breaks off in your mouth at a straight fissure, instead of a random line like other chips. The ridges also provide the chips with a bit more structural strength, because without it, it would just be a soggy Lay.

Time for “authentic” barbecue… it’s definitely got a bit of sweetness to it, which is a tad less than what I would expect from real barbecue. While most chips are satisfactorily sweetened, some are over-sweetened and you get a strong burst of a caramel sort of flavor at the end. The sweetness is balanced out by a savory smokiness that creates an interesting flavor profile for the chip. The sweetness fades a bit over the course of the chewing, allowing the savoriness to come out more right before swallowing. If the particular chip was not adequately seasoned, then raw potato flavor will come out at the end.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 4.0/5. Could use more crunch, but has a nice shape and size.

Taste: 4.0/5. Good flavor, but could be sweeter and stronger in flavor.

OVERALL: 4.0/5


Original Guacachip

Hey guys,

I’m not doing a Frito-Lay review today - it’s the Original Guacachip by El Sabroso. Yes, it is certainly an original flavor, and an original name as well.

The shape is roughly similar to that of Doritos, a triangle-shaped piece of tortilla. Even the size is similar. This means that the Guacachip is a nice shape and size, perfect for snacking. However, it is inferior in terms of texture: the chip is certainly crunchy, but it’s kind of a stale crunch. The chip is not as thick as a Dorito, which results in less tortilla to crunch on. The chip is also fairly dry, so grinding the chip doesn’t turn it into mush. It turns into… well, the only way to describe it is wet sand. It’s a bit moist from my saliva, but I can still feel the little individual pieces of chip that I’ve crunched up.

When I think of guacamole, I think of a mild sort of avocado flavor with sharp and bitter overtones from onion. The Guacachip delivers fairly well: when you first put the chip in your mouth, your tongue catches bits of salt coating the chip. This contrasts sharply with the next flavor, after the salt has moved towards the back of your mouth. You get that creamy, mild flavor of avocado, but instead of sharp onion taste, there’s a kind of sweet and tangy taste, almost like citrus.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 2.5/5. Too dry and could be crunchier.

Taste: 2.5/5. Exotic and unique.

OVERALL: 2.5/5



Shrimp Flavored Chips - Hot Garlic

Hey guys,

I am switching it up here with some Asia-inspired snacks. For lack of a better name, I will just call these Shrimp Flavored Chips - Hot Garlic. After all, that is what it says on the bag. Unfortunately, I have not reviewed the original flavor yet, but this will have to do:

These “chips” are fried ridged strips, like a Ruffle but thicker. It has an airy yet crunchy texture that is reminiscent of those wafer snacks. These chips stay crunchy for many bites, until you’re ready to swallow… in which case these chips have already disintegrated like cotton candy. It sort of just disappears. As for size, the chips are a tad too small for my taste. Eating two at once is best.

As for flavor, there certainly is a strong garlic flavor. It’s got that sharp savory garlic taste that I was expecting, as well as a bit of spiciness that keeps the chip alive. The shrimp flavor is somewhat lost in the initial crunch, but brings a more mellow, fishy taste on those chips that have less garlic powder on them. After the chip has disintegrated and the garlic powder more or less dissolved, the shrimpy, fishy flavor emerges as with the original flavor, but the garlic taste still lingers.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 3.0/5. Nice crunch, but unconventional shape and quick melting.

Taste: 3.5/5. Nice savory garlic flavor, but is strong at times and leaves bad breath.

OVERALL: 3.5/5


Doritos - Spicy Sweet Chili

Hey guys,

Back with a relatively new variety of chips from Frito-Lay: Doritos Spicy Sweet Chili. I remember when it first come out, the whole flavor was writing in the “spicy” font, but now there’s a different font for all three words. Interesting.

Like all Doritos: The chip is relatively soft compared to some others I’ve eaten, but packs a good amount of crunch, although it could be crunchier. It degenerates quickly in the mouth and is easy to chew into mush and swallow. A full-sized triangular chip is sometimes too large to eat in one bite, which leads to crumbs dropping everywhere and less of a mouthful the second bite.

This chip definitely has a very unique flavor. When I first put it in my mouth, I get a sweet-and-sour flavor that is really quite tangy and sweet. It reminds me of Americanized Chinese food, where savory flavors are mixed with the sweet to create an “exotic” taste. I guess the base of this chip’s taste comes from chili, sweet chili. The entire tangy mix is overshadowed by a spicy heat that appears when the chip first starts turning into mush and lasts for a few seconds afterwards. With something this unique, I was expecting more depth in the chip, but unfortunately I find it to be quite one-dimensional and flat in its flavor. The exotic taste does not change from the first bite to the swallow.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 3.5/5. Good overall, chips could be smaller and crunchier.

Taste: 3.0/5. Unique flavor, an acquired taste.

OVERALL: 3.0/5


Doritos - Pizza Supreme

Hey guys,

I’m back today with what I believe is Doritos’s newest flavor - Pizza Supreme. I’ve seen this flavor for a few months now, so I can’t wait to try it.

Like all Doritos: The chip is relatively soft compared to some others I’ve eaten, but packs a good amount of crunch, although it could be crunchier. It degenerates quickly in the mouth and is easy to chew into mush and swallow. A full-sized triangular chip is sometimes too large to eat in one bite, which leads to crumbs dropping everywhere and less of a mouthful the second bite.

To be honest, I was expecting this chip to taste like Pringles Pizza flavor. However, I got something very different - I didn’t even know exactly how to describe it until after my second day of eating. The flavor profile is tomato-based, and then some other flavors come out - savory baked cheese, and… that’s it. I’m not sure what flavors Frito-Lay was thinking of when it designed this chips. Unfortunately, there is no catchy description of the chip on the back of this bag; instead, it is an ad for old-school Doritos Taco flavor. So that’s it I guess… a savory, almost Ranch-like, but one-dimensional taste.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 3.5/5. Good overall, chips could be smaller and crunchier.

Taste: 3.0/5. Kind of weird and not very tasty. Perfect for a “mystery” flavor pack.

OVERALL: 3.0/5


Lay’s (Kettle Cooked) - Spicy Cayenne and Cheese

Hey everyone,

I queued the last post, and it screwed up… but here it is:

I do sincerely apologize for the delay between reviews. It’s been a busy month, but I will try to squeeze in more time for chip-eating. I had this review prepared for a while now, but I never posted it. In that time, I managed to lose the pictures… but anyways:

Like one would expect from kettle-cooked chips, these chips are hard and have a powerful crunch, so powerful, in fact, that I heard someone’s crunching from a different room while I was listening to music on some speakers. The chips are mostly the ideal bite-size; however, every now and then you’ll find a chip that’s too big, and if you try to eat it in one bite, the chip is so hard that it will bruise the soft roof of your mouth after a while. This can be solved by eating the chip in two bites, but this is messy and drops crumbs everywhere.

These chips are reminiscent of the Mediterranean Herb flavor. The description on the back of the bag says, “The smooth taste of white cheddar is perfectly balanced by the spicy kick of cayenne peppers in these flavorful chips.” The white cheddar flavor is strong, providing a nice savory taste that is a bit strong at times, although rather well-balanced for the most part. It is sometimes even savory to the point of getting a ranch flavor. The spicy pepper taste is not apparent, however, and the chip is not even spicy. Overall, it has a rather one-dimensional flavor profile. But I must say that this chip is unique in that flavor diminishes minimally with continuous snacking, so you can enjoy the flavor for longer.

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THE VERDICT

Texture: 4.5/5. Nice bite, close to ideal. Could be a tad less crunchy.

Taste: 3.0/5. Nice savory cheddar flavor, but that’s about it.  

OVERALL: 3.5/5

(sorry I lost the pics, here is a low-quality stock picture)